How Young is Too Young?

At my co-op placement the other day we were on break, and I got talking to my employer. We were talking about our families, and she asked me how old my mom is. When I told her, she was shocked. She said that you don’t hear about too many people having children that late anymore – I didn’t think it was that bad, but I guess to some people it’s a pretty big gap.
But that’s when it hit me – are people really expected to have children so young now?

I’m not terribly close with anyone who’s had children while they’re still in high school or college, but it’s not unheard of, even to me. Any of the ones that I’ve heard of, they weren’t planning on having a child so young. They had plans & goals, none of which involved having their own children.

Times haven’t really changed all that much, teenagers have always done things that they know their parents wouldn’t approve of, but still, there’s been a steady decline in numbers of teenage/young mothers. There’s multiple statistics that say why; the availability of contraceptives. Abortion, birth control, you name it – it’s all out there at anyone’s convenience. So I guess most of these people had plans that didn’t involve children too.

I don’t have much experience myself with teenage pregnancy, seeing as I don’t have my own child or know many people who have had them young, but one person that I do know has made her story clear.

She had her first child when she was only in grade 10, and had another when she would have been in grade 11. Most people know that if your pregnant, you’re not at school anymore – at least while your pregnant; so, she was forced to leave school. When told that it’s a bad example to the other students, she complained back that she didn’t see what was such a bad example – to be a pregnant teenager who wants to continue on with her education. Although before then she hid it under her clothes, it eventually became obvious. To this day she loves her kids, but there’s a constant struggle to support them and to know how to handle things peacefully.

On the other hand there’s people who wait till they’re in their 40s to have children. My aunt for example is 48, and is the mother of two boys; the youngest is two. Just imagine being in your early 60s with two teenage boys running around.

So I ask, what’s a decent age to be having children? Obviously it’s not what I had thought – and I only know three people who are/were teenage mothers.
So think about it, how young is too young?
(and then comment) 🙂

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Posted on October 12, 2010, in Assignments, What's on My Mind. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. My mom had me when she was 31 and my brother when she was 33 and she was married to my dad for 11 years before they ever thought of children! Its crazy how now adays people are getting married at 21 and having kids like a year later. I think that you should have kids around 30. Maybe I’m saying that only because my mom did that but I think its smart to wait before having kids.

  2. I think that a good age is like mid twenties to early thirties…ya it’s a bit young but it’s old enough to have a job and be able to support yourself and you’re children…like i wanna have kids when I’m like 27ish, ya it’s a bit young but i wanna have the energy to play with my kids and be able to chase them around when they’re still toddlers.

  3. I think early to mid to late twenties is best.
    Like anywhere from 23-30.
    any later than that and you become one of those people with teenagers in the house when you’re 60.
    However, you also dont want to rush kids just for the sake of having kids. You need to be comfortable with the person you’re with and you need to be in a reasonably stable point in your life.
    To quote my Grandma, “Have kids while you’re young and can’t afford to do anything else anyway.”

    (:

  4. I want to have atleast one kid or be pregnant by the time I’m 23. Of course I want to be married with a loving partener, but there are multiple reasons behind why I want to have kids when I’m younger, my parents for instance have a 23, 22, 17 a 14 year old. My mom is 48 and my dad is 49 and although they had my older brother and sister when they were 25 and 26 they didn’t have me until they were 31 and 32 and even though I know they tried, I found that they couldn’t do the things I wanted them to do with me when I was younger. I couldn’t ride bikes with my mom or convince my dad to play soccer with me, they were always to busy with work and after work always to tired. I really want to be able to play with my kids when there younger and make them feel like I was there for them.

    My parents age is another reason I want to have kids a bit younger than most people would suspect, I love my dad to peices but he’s a smoker, and because of that I fear that he won’t be in my childrens lives for long – although its a terrible thing to think about my family has a history of health problems – and I want my kids to grow up knowing him and spending sunday at my parents house, as well as my parents parents – and the air willing. If I do have kids when I’m 23, I would like them to meet my then 104 year old Great Grandmother. ( still kicking today I might add, at the ripe age of 99)

    I don’t want people to get the wrong impression, I’m not having kids young just so they can meet my family, 23 has always been my golden age to have my family life begun. And why not kick it off with a kid or two.

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